Beautiful Horefrost <3

CookieMac is back! Pt.2

These past months since school started have been pretty crazy to be honest. If you know me well you will probably know what caused the hussle and bussle. I've had so much to be thankful for with many witnessing opportunities at school and so many opportunities to grow in the Lord... But oh selfish me didn't take the time to count her blessings. Thus i wasn't talking to the Lord much, at all on that matter.

School is gradually getting more difficult to deal with... not giving into worldly lusts like all the music out there... its so in your face and inside i'm screaming for someone to save me from it. Yeah, you could say i was coasting. I have been fooled into that thinking because I'm serving the Lord through the Narrow Road Ministries at school and church i have the ability to hide behind a "good" curtain and make it look like i'm doing it with all my heart and only for the Lord.

The truth is, i've been abusing that opportunity to make myself look good... to make myself look like i actually have an important job to do for the Lord. I know that it is important, but i was only doing it for myself. Like Paul said, "I do the things I don't want to do and don't do the things I want to do." So, i have to bring discipline back into my life again, make myself accountable to my christian friends, and give myself the desire to talk about it when i'm going through hard times.

So yeah, i'm planting my feet back on the road again. I just bought a new devotional book and its been a really blessing. It starts out with a testimony about a young man my age and it totally relates with what my life has been in the last couple years. Its amazing how God uses people just like us to open our eyes to reality.

So, i'll leave you with this verse, my favorite one =] ..

"And we know that all things work together for good to them that love God, to them who are the called according to his purpose."

-Romans 8:28

Prayers and blessings,
CookieMac <3

CookieMac is back!

Far Away- 12 Stones
Something keeps on pulling me down
And I feel like I'm losing ground
Trying just to find my reasons
And losing sense of what is real

Willing to believe in something
Forgetting to believe in me
Will I find my place in your mind
Or will I fall away in time

Now I'm feeling so far away
And now I'm hating you every day

Waiting just to see the image
You follow down my road again
Trying just to find your purpose
You're fading faster every day

Willing to believe in something
Forgetting to believe in me
Will I find my place in your mind
Or will I fall away in time

Now I feel I'm losing time
Yesterday slipped away
When you didn't know
Time and time again you wanted
more than I had to give
To leave me with nothing
I'm waiting and dreaming
Yesterday slipped away
When you didn't know
And no more waiting
Let me back

to be continued.......

Our Love... Us... Forever Inseperable <3

Our hearts speak without volume..with a loud triumphant beating heart we love each other like fire in a desert,

With every breath a flame ignites, a passion deeper than the core

Words of our mouth are useless in this time

We shine

We shine the beauty of our bond, our unity as one

Innocence soaks our being faster than light can reach

The struggle keeps us going through the fire of our lips

All heaven kisses the eyes of we who truly live

Doubt is foreign, foreign to us

One

Holy lust fills our thoughts which nothing can seperate us from

Our hearts speak without volume..with a loud triumphant beating heart we love each other like fire in a desert.

10/27/07... I Grew Up this Week

To the many who know me probably know or have heard about Timmy Quinney. We all lost an extraordinary man two weeks ago today. I don't know where to begin, there's so many things to say about this *miracle* =]

First of all, i thank my Father in heaven for giving me the incredible strength to stand through this rain. Without Him, i am nothing. I would be going absolutely insane if i did not have the joy of the Lord in me.

Second, i want to thank Timmy's family for showing me and many others that how strong someone can be even when you lose your own child. Seeing you carry on has helped me get through this in a great way.

Third, i want to send out a huge thanks to all my friends who have been so comforting and with your prayers and kind words, I have found early on in these weeks that this is not an entirely sad experience, I'm so happy Timmy was such an angel and such a blessing to everyone he knew and i'm discovering more and more how much he did for people, so unselfishly. You guys in the youth group, thank you so much for your hugs and support that night. I'm so thankful that we're all taking this so well. Without you, i would have probbly shut the world out, been so depressed and weak.

I've found the meaning of true sacrificial love in frienship. Timmy Quinney, Sonny Benson & Lougan Dumont went to the face of death and helped each other to the end. God was with them till the end. He willed and planned this to happen for his glory. He used Timmy's life as an instrument for Sonny's salvation, and possibly other's. "When you figure out love is all that matters after all, it sure makes everything else seem so small."

Sonny's recovery has given me the hope i would have never even dreamed of. God was so gracious in sparing him for this while. I'm so blown away by the emotional strength he has, i was so worried he would be broken by the loss of his best friend. "Best friend" does not do them justice for the kind of frienship they had, i don't if you can get any closer than they were. <3

.A Blind World.

Romans 7:18-19

"I know that nothing good lives in me, that is, in my sinful nature. For I have the desire to do what is good, but I cannot carry it out. For what I do is not the good I want to do; no, the evil I do not want to do—this I keep on doing."

This passage was read in my Student Ministries class this morning and it really came out at me. It is so true, so sobering. I'm constantly thinking and doing things i so despise.. and yet i do them anyway. This week i caught myself thinking some sinful things and i had no idea why i was thinking them.. they just came.. and i was like "What??? How did i ever get thinking that??" i just said, "Get away! now! i don't want you anymore!" It immediately vanished but it still so surprised me how fast it came with little effort.

This proves how we are so sinful, through and through. And we as christians are so aware of this sinful desire that we commit daily... but i was thinking today... what about the world? What do they know about sin? It doesn't affect them.. and they're rarely guilty.. how can they know the devastating effects of sin and it's wicked ways?... they worship sin. The world is unaware of what is good. Of course they faintly see the effects of sin daily, but just think of it as mishaps. The wars and deaths and tragedies and disasters effect them so, but they only see it as misfortune.

The world is SO unaware of the good things God wants to see in us... and don't even know that they are GOOD, desirable, admirable things. For example, pride is the one thing that the world absolutely loves and inhabits... and at the same time, its the very thing God hates. Luke 4:11- "For everyone who exalts himself will be humbled, and he who humbles himself will be exalted." It sadens me so, to think how blind the world is to the most amazing things in life. Anyways, just wanted to jot down those few things for today. Have a good one y'all. God bless you this week :)

In Christ,

Courtney ♥

Hard Work?

Excerpt from "The 7 Habits of Highly Effective Teens" by Sean Covey.......

"I was listening to a speech on tape when the speaker began comparing the challenges faced by today's teens to those of teens who lived 150 years ago. I listened with interest. I agreed wth most of what he said until this: "The challenge that teens faced 150 years ago was hard work. The challenge that teens face today is a lack of hard work. "

Ex-squeeze me! I mumbled to myself. A lack of hard work? What are you smokin'? I think teens are busier today and working harder than ever. I see it with my own eyes every day. Between school, extracurricular activites, teams, clubs, student government, athletics, partime jobs, helping to raise a younger brother or sister, and on and on, there's barely time to breathe. A lack of hard work? Ha! Milking cows and mending fences doesn't sound any more difficult than juggling the multifaceted life of a modern teen. "

__________________________________

Courtney's comments:

Hard work... its what we all have to do in order to be successful. If you avoid it, you're gonna fail. The question is, are you enjoying your work?

mentality - (a habitual or characteristic mental attitude that determines how you will interpret and respond to situations)

Whats your mentality towards what your parents ask you to do.. the favors friends ask of you... your school work?

Your mentality will make the huge difference in your life of work. Just think... you have 10 months of school.... 5 days a week.... what are you going to do with that time? The only way to overcome it, is to enjoy it and have the will to succeed.... all which comes from a desire to respect the authority that God has placed above you to teach & correct you... to prepare you for life... and most importantly, the ultimate desire to gloirfy God in all that you do. So as a christian, you would naturally be a person of character and dignity towards the work, hard work.. God has placed in your life.

Anyways, i was just reading that book and liked that little article... and wanted to expand on it with a christian point of view.

Have a great day =]

In Christ,

Courtney <3

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Intro:

First of all... to the few people that read this blog... i'm so sorry i have not been keeping ontop of this.. i've been lazy... and busy... and just whatever the past couple months, but now that everything is back to the normal school routine, everything is a lot more smoother... and absolutely wonderful.

This summer my soul was kind of down in the pits.. i wasn't excited and enthusiastic about spiritual things (due to some sin in my life). I did want to get back up on my feet, but not completely... and my whole heart wasn't there. As September was quickly approaching i was scared that i wouldn't have the spiritual strength I needed to start school in the fall. I was scared i lost the mindset and energy i had earlier in the summer towards going into the public school system as a christian. About a week and a half before school started i started praying my little slefish heart out that God would radically change my attitude and that i would regain the relationship i had with Him.

I had no idea about it, but God was changing my heart while i was praying, and through the encouragement of my amazing, faithful christian friends I once again found the love of Christ lavished on me. I'd like to say i'm back to normal again now, in every way... and even better.

When people ask me how my first week of school went i say "Great!" It really is such a blessing and i had no idea what i was missing when i was homeschooling... though, this couldn't be a more perfect time to go back to school.

I'm more mature, and i can handle a lot more of everything (than i would have in gr. 7).. and my attitude.. well, i don't even know where to begin. I don't know how to say this without sounding selfish, but i'm the luckiest person in the world cuz i'm going to that school. It's not the school.. its not the teachers or education, and its not even the friends that's there.. its the attitude and enthusiasm God daily places in my heart with more and more love as He gives it.

I find it so incredibly amazing how i can minute-ly (if thats a word), openly present Jesus Christ in my words and actions- in front of hundreds of kids! How cool is that?? You say, "but Courtney, not everything's always going to be sunny and joyful." - that is so not true! Haha.. If i can be joyful in the happy times... what gives me the excuse to be unhappy in unfortunate times? What excuse do i have when i'm staring sin in the face? You and i both know very well of the consequences if i walk down a road of sin ... Why go there? And why even think about making a decision.. just say no! Never think for one moment that you don't have the ability to have victory over sin... no matter how strong the impulse is to do what everyone else is doing.

If your heart is not with Christ's you may find it harder... and you may even find yourself living two lives. With Christ... life is always on the sunny side of the street, even if you are going through the hardest times.. its remarkable how God can continually give you a glowing heart full of peace & joy. I OFTEN find myself humbled at how great our God is... that He is able to keep me calm when someone is putting me down and keep my mouth from retaliating or thinking sinful thoughts.

Looking Through My Eyes:

My approach to the public school system as a believer in Jesus Christ...

1. Make sure my heart is where it needs to be in order to be a sucessful Christian in a body of unbelievers.

2. Daily honor my father and mother, and most importantly, God. (Don't be the teenager the world creates).

3. Be emotionally seperate from the student body. Do not think like the world, do not act like the world, do not look like the world. Despise the pride of life, the lust of the flesh, and the lust of the eyes.

4. Honor your teachers! I know this is kinda cheesy... but always smile =]. Shine for Jesus. Do your best... do all your homework, take responsibility and care. I find this one very important, cuz in class... kids can be little jitter boxes...... speak only when spoken to. If you know the teacher or person in higher authority would not appreciate it, don't bother doing it.

5. Be punctual, be consistant, and don't be afraid to proclaim His name. With every appropriate opportunity i get, i try to somehow fit a part of the gospel into my schoolwork. It makes it so much more exciting that way because i'm writing about something i'm passionate for.

6. Be calm and mysterious (l0l). Don't get anxious about anything. [Philippians 4:6- "Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God."]

7. Constantly be talking with God. Thank Him, praise Him, and ask Him to help you whenever u need it. He's not gonna bite you and he's not gonna run away if you ask him a big favor.

8. Analyze the wordly lifestyle and compare it to scripture. Do not buy into anything anybody says before coming to your Father first.

9. When you see someone who's hurting or in need. Talk to them. Look through eyes of love, not contempt. Be gentle... and even quote the appropriate scripture... and pray for that person. Your own personal testimony is a great tool to lead someone to Christ.

10. The 10 Commandments. Live them out.. show yours peers that your priorities and wants are different than theirs. Materialism is not your thing.

11. This one is very important to me.. treat everyone equally. Do not show favor or hate to anyone and never speak badly about someone. Keep your promises, be faithful, and maintain a Godly reputation. Strive for purity in everything.

12. Make every situation an opportunity, whether its good or bad. How you handle it will show your character. Resist temptation. Let that situation be an opportunity to shine for Jesus. Live like Jesus did.

13. Everything is beautiful! That statement speaks for itself. Like Starfield so perfectly said it...

"Everything is beautiful, Even when the tears are falling, I don't need a miracle to believe, Even in the crashing down, I can hear redemtion calling, and everything is beautiful to me."

14. Join The Rebelution.... a teenage rebellion against low expectations. I found this article this week i love "how they do.".... http://www.therebelution.com/about/rebelution.htm

1 Timothy 4:12...

"Don't let anyone look down on you because you are young, but set an example for the believers in speech, in life, in love, in faith and in purity."

So, that's my update for this fall. I'm so glad i could finally just sit and write with no limits. Praise God for giving me the words. Me is happy =D God bless. Please pray for me and my walk with God, as well as my witness in the school. Thanks!

In Christ,

Courtney <3

This is my devotion:

If he is not speaking and if he is not listening, with every moment let his soul burst out in worship for our glorious Father in heaven above.

CookieMac

Matthew 5:16

"In the same way, let your light shine before men, that they may see your good deeds and praise your Father in heaven."